Well I read my old post and I think it is so boring (Talking to myself....) though I'm happy that it's not empty.
Aaah! My Life is just boring!
I have been jobless for at least a month now after I couldn't take that assistant manager (i was more like a receptionist) life. I hate being in that position. But it was some kind of experience. I didn't fit in there.
Since then I've been looking for work but to no avail. I guess I'm in a wrong track. I have been suffering from insomnia and I'm dealing this by playing my guitar, reading books about furniture design and packaging design. I decided to gain more knowledge about the field that will hopefully open to me and get to know were I stand.
I'm so scared about my MA application for next year as it is I missed this year, I'm awfully depressed about it. But in a way when i look at my graduate works, it looks so shabby. So I'm modifying my portfolio all over again.
The reason I'm slacking is my laziness and no one to talk to. I give up easily these days. But then looking at mom and dad, I pinch myself out of my gloomy world.
I'm trying to bring good life through my work. But it has just started and I'm already irritated thinking what if I suck! :O My work as in my portfolio. I seriously need to start from the scratch. There is so much to do and got to learn so much more.
Now the problem arises with my gloominess is money. No matter how much you have it never stays. I'm embarrassed to tell mom that I ain't have a penny. She knows before I could even tell her. So again she has been providing me. I always told her I'll take care of her but it was always the other way round.
I'm even scared if i could make it next year. My opportunities so far looks grim. BTW! My comp is still conk! Sigh! Why can't anything be genuine when I shelled out so much amount for it?
I hate reading this. I realize I never really had a moment of rejoice in my life. I feel like such a stupid drama queen or female who ca't get her life without disappointments. I feel like I'm self centered whenever I talk about these things because all I can talk about is me, my and I.
Baah! I thought I'll start with something nice and end with something nice, turns out to be like the usual again.
Maybe I should make another Blog something not related to me at all but something to do with the world. I guess this blog is only meant for me to just punch out my thoughts out to have peace of mind. Sigh! Wish I was some kind of Genius to invent something. Randomness!!
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